because your smile makes me live ♥

She's back with the voices

Coping with anxiety is stopping copying as a functional human being.


The mind goes wild, the ego takes place. Trying very hard to shut up the voices, but after a few seconds on control, it restart the loop. The body shakes, the stomatch hurts, the nausea comes and go, it's hot but also cold. I can't feel comfortable, I can't stop crying, I'm not able to control my body even less my thoughts, I feel like nothing makes sense. I want something that I don't know what it is.


Is scary here, my body is asking for pain. I don't want to move, I want to stay in bed but I don't want to be quiet. The crying is so deep, silent, loud. It hurts physically, mentally and in my heart.


Breath, controlling the thoughts, taking care of the body, but then I start thinking again. The weight is too much for my fragile body. A scale: one side with comfort but without income and the other side without comfort but with freedom. I don't want, but is the right choice for my soul.


Is slowing down, my body is exausthed. But the moment I say this, everything is coming back. Living with anxiety with physical symptoms is hard, an awful experience, very lonely.



Am I capable? Am I strong enough to copy with this again? 


I don't feel capable but the minutes are passing...

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